Seeking advice from the Reddit community, a mother shared her experience of being turned away by her daughter after being unable to provide the child with a lavish lifestyle. Instead, her daughter lived with the woman’s ex-husband and grew up spoiled. Years later, the daughter knocked at the woman’s door, asking to be taken in after her father kicked her out.
Like many relationships, a woman ended hers with her husband when their daughter, Maria, was ten years old. It was an unfortunate circumstance but something she had to deal with.
The woman was awarded their house during her divorce but faced financial struggles as a stay-at-home mom. Fortunately, she reached stability when she landed a job in her field. Still, she had to budget her expenses and did not spend lavishly.
Meanwhile, her husband had no problem with financial resources and made sure his daughter knew it. Maria’s father indulged her in material things, so the child grew up without financial restraints. Eventually, this strained the mother-daughter relationship.
Once, the woman couldn’t afford to buy her daughter a $1000 laptop, resulting in Maria telling her mother that her father was better than her. In another instance, Maria’s mother tried to get her a job, but it only resulted in another argument.
When she turned 17, Maria decided to drop out of high school, which sparked a heated conversation between her and her mother. “She told me it was her life and she can do what she wants,” the woman said. Eventually, the argument led to Maria leaving her mom and moving in with her father permanently.
Although the woman tried to contact her daughter, Maria refused to reconnect and said she no longer had a mother. However, at 21, Maria decided to reach out to her mom. The woman narrated:
“Her dad has gotten remarried and basically kicked her out. She called me, and we met up. She wants to move back in.”
While the woman was open to the idea of living with her daughter again, she did not accept Maria with open arms. Instead, she listed conditions that Maria had to meet before she would be allowed to move in again.
The woman’s conditions included Maria getting her GED, working 25 or more hours weekly, and going to school to plan her career. Maria also needed to buy her personal belongings and share in household chores. However, she need not pay for the rent.
While getting her life together and planning for a bright future, Maria’s mom did not want her to party every night like she was used to. Instead, she could do as she pleases on the weekends.
After hearing about all her mother’s conditions, Maria called the woman crazy and a horrible mother. “I informed her that she made it clear that she has no mother,” the woman said. The conversation ended with Maria walking out on her mom.
The woman later shared her situation on Reddit, hoping to get the thoughts of the online community forum, and received several words of support and encouragement. “Her reaction to your requirements indicates that she doesn’t want a relationship. She looking to mooch off of you and make your life hell again,” one person said.
Other Reddit users found the conditions reasonable and primarily for Maria’s benefit in the future. Considering her adult age, she should not have contested her mom’s requests.
Was the woman right to give her daughter a list of demands in exchange for coming home and living rent-free after her dad kicked her out at 21? What would you have done in the woman’s place?