70-year-old widow posts newspaper advert looking for new husband, only for it to go viral

Getting back into the dating world can be strange, and intimidating, especially if it’s been a long time since you were last single. Of course, the most important lesson to remember is that it’s crucial you stay open to others and don’t judge anyone too quickly.

It was with that in mind that I decided to share a funny story I recently came across online. It involves a 70-year-old widow, a newspaper advert, and a search for a new husband.

She was at home one day when her doorbell suddenly rang … only, she couldn’t possibly have predicted who would be on the other side.

Read the full hilarious joke below — and make sure you stick with it until the punchline.

A lonely 70-year-old widow decided that it was time to marry again…

She put an ad in the local newspaper that read:

“Husband wanted! Must be in my age group, must not beat me, must not run around on me and must still be good in bed. All applicants please apply in person.”

The following day, she heard the doorbell. Much to her dismay, she opened the door to see a gray-haired gentleman sitting in a wheelchair. He had no arms or legs.

“You’re not really asking me to consider you, are you?” the widow asked: “Just look at you — you have no legs!”

The old gent smiled: “Therefore, I cannot run around on you!”

“You don’t have any arms either!” she snorted.

Again, the old man smiled: “Therefore, I can never beat you!”

She raised an eyebrow and asked intently: “Are you still good in bed?”

The old man leaned back, beamed a big smile and said: “I rang the doorbell, didn’t I?”

Why not help cheer a friend up? Share this joke and help give someone a good laugh!

 

Related Posts

30 Minutes ago in California, Gavin Newsom was confirmed as…See more

30 Minutes ago in California, Gavin Newsom was confirmed as the headline speaker for the annual National Climate Action Summit, solidifying the state’s front-line role in the…

My Brother Stole from Me After I Helped Him—But Setting Boundaries Was What Finally Saved Him

I didn’t think twice when my younger brother, Darren, lost his job. I sent him about $3,000 to help with groceries and rent, simply to buy him…

Trump Accuses Sen. Adam Schiff of Mortgage Fraud — Schiff Fires Back, Calling It “Baseless Political Retaliation”

Sen. Adam Schiff, D-Calif., and President Donald Trump rekindled their long-running feud Tuesday morning when Trump leveled serious charges against the California lawmaker, this time for alleged…

Hillary Clinton Shares Sad News

In a recent public statement that stirred heartfelt reactions across the political and public spectrum, former Secretary of State and 2016 presidential candidate Hillary Clinton delivered emotional…

How to get rid of rats and mice naturally with Vick Vaporub!

Keeping rats at bay is easy using Vick Vaporub, an ointment that most people already have in their homes. Here’s how it works. What You Need: Three…

Taylor Swift admits that she tested positive for…See More

In a heartfelt Instagram post just moments ago, Taylor Swift revealed that she has tested positive for COVID-19, forcing her to postpone tonight’s highly anticipated Eras Tour…

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *