Megan Rapinoe Loses $25M Broadcasting Deal After Embarrassing World Cup Loss

Megan Rapinoe’s career in soccer is over. She was, however, looking forward to a lucrative new endeavor as a broadcaster with the World Soccer Network, a subsidiary of Futbol Internationale.

Unfortunately, with the embarrassing loss during the World Cup, the network has decided her brand’s legacy isn’t quite what they thought they were paying for.

“We’d like to hire the Megan Rapino of five years ago, before all the controversy,” said WSN Vice President of Programming Joe Barron, “but we would have settled for a champion. Now we have the memory of the kick she missed on a wide-open goal.”

Rapinoe’s spokesman has gone dark since the botched strike from “the best to ever play the game.”

ALLOD Correspondent Skip Tetheludah caught up with the player herself on her flight home from Sweden, where the incident occurred. “It’s kind of silly,” she chuckled,” that people think a penalty kick is a sure thing and that a net with a goalie standing in it is somehow empty. I’m not really concerned with what a bunch of pseudo-patriotic chuds think. They actively root against the team playing under their flag because they don’t like its leader’s politics.”

She makes a decent point, patriots. Would we root for another country in a war just because we don’t like our current leader?

Wait. Don’t answer that. God Bless America.

Related Posts

Full story.

“Be careful…” the receptionist said quietly, glancing toward my boyfriend. Confused, I asked, “What do you mean?” She hesitated, then whispered, “He’s been here before—with someone else….

I Lost My Gold Earrings, Two Days Later, My Neighbor Was Wearing Them

I used to think our marriage was unshakable. After eight years together, Mark and I had built a life of quiet rituals—Friday night takeout, weekend strolls, inside…

Trump Deploys U.S. Marines to…See More

The U.S. military has confirmed a controversial new deployment: 200 U.S.Marines are being sent to Florida to assist Immigration and Customs Enforcement (ICE) with logistical and administrative…

Trump Admin Sending Hundreds of Marines to Florida to Help ICE

The U.S. military said Thursday that 200 Marines will be sent to Florida to provide logistical and administrative support to Immigration and Customs Enforcement (ICE). The Marines…

Scientists reveal that consumption of TOMATO causes… see more…

Scientists reveal that consumption of tomato causes surprising health benefits and protective effects that go far beyond what most people expect. The Science Behind Tomatoes Tomatoes are…

How Simple Acts of Kindness Change Lives Forever

In a world racing toward success, wealth, and recognition, it’s easy to overlook the quiet souls who sit on life’s sidelines. Their presence is often unnoticed, their…

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *