The weight of grief never truly lifts. It’s been five years since I lost my wife, Winter, but the pain still feels fresh. Our daughter, Eliza, was just 13 when it happened. Now 18, she’s grown into a young woman who carries her mother’s absence like a silent shadow.
As I stared at the calendar, the circled date mocking me, the pit in my stomach deepened. Another year had passed, and another anniversary was approaching. I called out to Eliza, “I’m heading to the cemetery, dear.”
Eliza appeared in the doorway, her indifference cloaking her eyes. “It’s that time again, isn’t it, Dad?”
I nodded, unable to find the words. What could I say? That I was sorry? That I missed her mother too? Instead, I grabbed my keys and headed out, leaving the silence to fill the space between us.
The florist’s shop was a burst of color and fragrance. The florist, with a sympathetic smile, asked, “The usual, Mr. Ben?”
“White roses. Just like always,” I replied, my steps heavy.
As she wrapped the bouquet, memories flooded my mind. The first time I’d bought Winter flowers. Our third date, when I was so nervous I’d nearly dropped them. She’d laughed, her eyes sparkling, and said, “Ben, you’re adorable when you’re flustered.”
Reality returned as the florist handed me the roses. “Here you go, Mr. Ben. I’m sure she’d love them.”
“Thanks. I hope so.”
The cemetery was quiet, save for the rustle of leaves in the breeze. I made my way to Winter’s grave, each step feeling heavier than the last. The black marble headstone came into view, her name etched in gold letters that seemed to shimmer in the weak sunlight.
Kneeling down, I carefully placed the roses against the stone, my fingers tracing the letters of her name. “I miss you, Winter. God, I miss you so much.”
The wind picked up, sending a chill down my spine. For a moment, I could almost imagine it was her touch, her way of telling me she was still here. But the cold reality settled in quickly. She was gone, and no amount of wishing would bring her back.
“I’ll be back next year, love. I promise.”
As I walked away, a thought nagged at me. Something was different this time. But I pushed it aside, chalking it up to the ever-present grief playing tricks on my mind.
The house was quiet upon my return. I headed to the kitchen, desperately in need of a strong cup of coffee. That’s when I saw them.
On the kitchen table, in a crystal vase I didn’t recognize, stood the same roses I had just left at Winter’s grave. My heart began to race, pounding so hard I could hear it in my ears.
“What the hell? Eliza!” I called out, my voice echoing through the empty house. “Eliza, are you here?”
I turned around, my eyes never leaving the roses. They were exactly the same as the ones I’d bought, with the same slight imperfections and the same dewdrops clinging to the petals.
“This can’t be happening,” I whispered, backing away from the table. “This can’t be real.”
I don’t know how long I stood there, staring at those impossible roses. The sound of footsteps snapped me out of my trance.
“Dad? What’s wrong?” Eliza stood on the staircase, her eyes widening as she took in my pale face.
“What’s going on, Dad? You look like you’ve seen a ghost.”
I pointed at the vase, my hand shaking. “Where did these roses come from, Eliza? Did you bring these home?”
She shook her head, confusion clear on her face. “No, I’ve been out with friends. I just got back. What’s wrong?”
My voice trembled as I struggled to speak. “These are the exact same roses I left at your mother’s grave. Identical, Eliza. How is that possible?”
Eliza’s face paled, her eyes darting between me and the flowers. “That’s not possible, Dad. Are you sure?”
“I’m sure. I need to go back to the cemetery. Now.”
The drive back to the cemetery was a blur. My mind raced with possibilities, each more unlikely than the last. Had someone followed me? Had I imagined leaving the flowers earlier? Was I losing my mind?
Eliza insisted on coming with me, but the ride was filled with an uncomfortable silence.
As we approached Winter’s grave, my heart sank. The spot where I’d carefully placed the roses was empty. No flowers and no sign that I’d been there at all.
“They’re gone. How can they be gone?”
Eliza knelt down, running her hand over the bare ground. “Dad, are you sure you left them here? Maybe you forgot—”
I shook my head vehemently. “No, I’m certain. I placed them right here, just a few hours ago.”
She stood up, her eyes meeting mine. “Let’s go home, Dad. We need to figure this out.”
Back at the house, the roses still sat on the kitchen table. Eliza and I stood on opposite sides, the flowers between us like a barrier.
“There has to be an explanation, Dad. Maybe Mom is trying to tell us something.”
I let out a weak laugh. “Your mother is dead, Eliza. Dead people don’t send messages.”
“Then how do you explain this?” she shot back, gesturing at the roses. “Because I’m running out of logical explanations.”
I ran a hand through my hair, frustration and fear bubbling inside me. “I don’t know, Eliza! I don’t know what’s going on, but it’s not… it can’t be…”
My voice trailed off as I noticed something tucked under the vase. A small, folded piece of paper I hadn’t seen before. With trembling hands, I reached for it.
“What is it, Dad?”
I unfolded the note, my heart stopping as I recognized the handwriting. Winter’s handwriting.
“I know the truth, and I forgive you. But it’s time for you to face what you’ve hidden.”
The room spun, and I gripped the edge of the table to steady myself. “No, this can’t be…”
Eliza snatched the note from my hand, her eyes widening as she read it. “Dad, what truth? What have you hidden?”
Years of lies and guilt crashed down on me. I sank into a chair, unable to meet Eliza’s gaze.
“Your mother,” I began, my voice cracking. “The night she died… it wasn’t just an accident.”
Eliza’s sharp intake of breath cut through the silence. “What do you mean?”
I forced myself to look at her, facing the pain in her eyes. “We had a fight that night. A big one. She found out I’d been having an affair.”
“An affair? You cheated on Mom?”
I nodded, shame burning in my chest. “It was a mistake, dear. A terrible mistake. I tried to end it, but your mother found out before I could. She was so angry and hurt. She stormed out of the house, got in the car—”
“And never came back,” Eliza finished, her voice cold.
“I never told anyone,” I continued, the words pouring out now. “I couldn’t bear for people to know the truth. To know that her death was my fault.”
Eliza was silent for a long moment, her eyes fixed on the roses. When she finally spoke, her voice was eerily calm.
“I knew, Dad!”
My head snapped up, disbelief engulfing me. “What do you mean, you knew?”
Eliza’s eyes met mine, and I saw years of pain and anger burning in them.
“I’ve known for years, Dad. Mom told me everything before she left that night. I found her diary after she died. I’ve known all along.”
“You’ve known? All this time?”
She nodded, her jaw clenched. “I wanted you to admit it. I needed to hear you say it.”
Realization dawned on me, cold and horrifying. “The roses and the note? It was you?”
“I followed you to the cemetery and took the flowers from Mom’s grave. I wanted you to feel the betrayal and hurt she felt. I copied her handwriting and left this note with the flowers because I wanted you to know that you can’t hide from the truth forever.”
“Why now? After all these years?”
Eliza’s eyes flicked to the calendar on the wall.
“Five years, Dad. Five years of watching you play the grieving widower while I carried the weight of your secret. I couldn’t do it anymore.”
“Eliza, I—”
“Mom forgave you. She wrote that in her diary. But I’m not sure I can,” Eliza cut me off, her words a dagger to my heart.
She turned and walked out of the kitchen, leaving me alone with the roses, the same roses that had once symbolized love, now an ominous reminder of the deceit that had torn our family apart.
Reaching out, I touched a soft white petal, realizing that some wounds never truly heal. They wait, hidden beneath the surface until the truth forces them into the light.