Psychologist Warns Of Dangers With The New ‘Demure’ Gen Z Craze

We have seen our share of TikTok trends come and go but sometimes, they really get her attention. That is the case for us and many others when it comes to the ‘very demure, very mindful’ trend.

Jools Lebron, A TikTok user, is the one who coined that trend. Although the word itself and spending used for centuries, she helped it to make a comeback and now it seems as if everybody is using it.

Something good to keep in mind is the fact that the demure trend is not necessarily something that was meant to be serious. It is actually poking fun at the influencers in many ways but is still a good word to keep in mind.

One psychologist, Dr. Lalitaa Suglani has quite a bit to say about this particular trend. She said that it was a good thing because it offered a sense of belonging, identity, and self-expression in the world where we live.

She said: “Trends provide a script for how to present oneself, often appealing to those who seek to fit in or find their place within a particular social group.

“The ‘demure’ trend, which emphasises modesty, elegance, and subtlety, contrasts with louder, more attention-grabbing personas and aligns with the need for simplicity, humbleness and groundedness.

“It provides a way for people to align themselves with values such as elegance and restraint, which may feel aspirational or calming.”

You might be wondering how this trend would affect working relationships. The psychiatrist also had something to say, as it may bring a sense of calmness and professionalism to the workplace.

“People who adopt the demure style may appear more grounded, composed, and attentive, traits that could build trust and authority,” she continued. “However, it might also create challenges for individuals who feel the need to suppress their opinions or self-expression to align with this more subdued persona, leading to stifled creativity or discomfort in voicing bold ideas.”

Will the demure trend affect friendships? The psychologist also had something to say.

“Friendships might evolve to be more centred on shared values like simplicity and thoughtfulness.”

This may lead to a deeper level of conversation.

Dr. Suglani also had a warning. She said: “On the flip side, if friends have contrasting approaches—some embracing a demure persona and others more expressive or extroverted—it might create subtle tension or misunderstanding.”

In a relationship, it may contribute to unrealistic expectations and hinder open emotional communication.

She said: “A balance would be needed to ensure that adopting a demure persona doesn’t prevent partners from expressing their true feelings or desires.”

The psychologist would like to highlight two of the primary dangers associated with the trend. These include suppressing true feelings and giving way to peer pressure.

“Emphasis on modesty and restraint’ could lead to individuals suppressing their true feelings, needs, or opinions in order to fit into the ‘demure’ ideal which could contribute to ‘feelings of inauthenticity’.

“Like all trends, ‘demure’ may pressure individuals to conform, limiting self-expression and creativity for fear of being seen as too bold or attention-seeking.

“This can create internal conflict, especially for people whose personalities are more extroverted or expressive.”

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