Have you ever gone to a confessional? If you are a Catholic, you probably have spent a considerable amount of time in the confessional telling the priest what you did wrong over the past week or so.
The man in the following joke is doing the same thing but he wants to do more than simply confess his sins. He wants to explain why he fell short of the mark.
As he continues to tell his story to the priest, it gets more and more intense. Before you know it, the priest is in trouble and you will be laughing.
This man goes to confession and says, “Forgive me Father for I have sinned.
The priest asks if he would like to confess his sins and the man replies that he used the “F-word” over the weekend.
The priest says, “Oh okay, just say three Hail Marys and try to watch your language.
The man replies that he would like to confess as to why he said the “F-word”.
The priest sighs and tells him to continue.
“Well, father I played golf on Sunday with my buddies instead of going,” he said.
The priest says, “And you got upset over that?”
The man replied, “No, that wasn’t why I swore. On the first tee I duck-hooked my drive well left into the trees.”
The priest said, “And that’s when you swore.”
The man replied, a little testily because of the constant interruptions, “No, it wasn’t. When I walked up the fairway, I noticed my ball got a lucky bounce and I had a clear shot to the green. However, before I could hit the ball, a squirrel ran by and grabbed my ball and scurried up a tree.
The priest asked, “Is that when you said the ‘F. word’?”
The man replied, “No, because an eagle then flew by and caught the squire in its shard aloes new flew away.”
The priest let out a breath and queried, “Is that when you swore?”
The man replied, “No, because the eagle flew over the green and the dying squirrel let go of my golf ball and it landed within 5 inches of the hole.”
The priest screamed, “Don’t tell me you missed the f….ing putt!”