A man goes into a restaurant and is seated.

All the waitresses are gorgeous. A particularly beautiful waitress came to his table. “What would you like, sir?”

He looks at the menu and then looks at her, then answers, “A quickie.” The waitress turns and walks away in disgust.

After she regains her composure, she returns and asks again, “What would you like, sir?”

Again, the man looks at her and answers, “A quickie, please.” This time her anger takes over, she reaches over and slaps him across the face with a resounding “SMACK!” and storms away.

A man sitting at the next table leans over and whispers… “Um, I think it’s pronounced ‘Quiche.’”

A man from Peru decided to visit America, although he spoke no English.
Upon reaching it, one of the first thing he did was go into a department store. He found his way to the menswear department where a young lady offered to help him.

“Quiero calcetines, (I want socks)” said the man.

“I don’t speak Spanish, but we have some very nice suits over here,” said the salesgirl.

“No, no quiero trajes. Quiero calcetines,(No I don’t want suits, I want socks.)” said the man.

“Well, these shirts are on sale this week,” declared the salesgirl.

“No, no quiero camisas. Quiero calcetines, (No I don’t want shirts, I want socks.)” repeated the man.

“I still don’t know what you’re trying to say. We have some fine pants on this rack,” offered the salesgirl.

“No, no quiero pantalones. Quiero calcetines,(No I don’t want pants, I want socks)” insisted the man.

As they passed the underwear counter, the man spotted a display of socks and happily grabbed a pair. Holding them up he proclaimed, “Eso sí que es (Now that’s it)!”

“Then why didn’t you just spell it in the first place?!?” yelled the salesgirl.